Recently in Family Category

We made our second trip to the Midwest MOMYS Retreat (which happens to the second edition of said event, making us 2 for 2) this past weekend. Thursday I was feeling pretty rotten, and Friday was worse what with the drive and all. But after a 2-hour nap on Saturday afternoon (sorry about being anti-social!) I felt much better.

So, the statistics for this year: 23 couples with 123 children attending (some couples have older children who did not attend), 11 states represented, and countless fun had by all. My oldest son became best friends with a slightly younger, delightful young lad who (sadly) normally resides in Minnesota. My daughter, who normally spends most of her time with boys, fit in just fine with a large pack of young ladies. The two middle boys mostly played with each other but roamed with the gangs of boys as well.

Oh, and Jamie and I enjoyed the fellowship as well. Lessee, last year I made a top ten list. I don't know if I'll make it to ten this year, but here are the highlights:

1. Just for Daddies time was awesome!
2. The food -- oh, the food! (repeat from last year)
3. Being able to say "Have you seen what socialization does to children these
days?" out loud and hearing a chorus of "amens!" in response
4. I'm not a big fan of the bluegrass/gospel style of music, but the family who
leads the singing is incredibly talented and it is a treat to listen to them (and
sing along!)
5. Hearing my 3yo sing "There's honey in the rock" (one of the hymns we
learned this year)
6. Being reminded that I can't even milk a cow without God's help (you'll know
what I mean if you were there -- otherwise, it will take too long to explain)
7. 175 people in a dining hall. My children running around getting underfoot and
making noise. Nobody is impatient, or upset, or frustrated about having to
walk around them, or put up with the noise. Does it get any better than that?

I think the last one pretty well sums it up. It is great being able to go somewhere for a whole weekend where kids are allowed to be kids, because everyone there loves kids. Much of our culture sees children as inconveniences -- noisy, needy, expensive inconveniences. As hindrances to the fun in life. But when you're with Momys folk, you know what you're doing is worth it, and you're not missing out on anything of lasting significance. There are times when I need to be reminded of it more than others. I hope to be returning to the Midwest Momys Retreat many times over the years!

A husband and father clearly has a responsibility to protect his family, to guard not just their hearts and minds but also their physical well-being. So what does that mean in our society, which is generally peaceful and well-ordered? Generally, I say -- obviously there is plenty of lawless behavior going on around us but relative to, say, Zimbabwe, my little corner of the world seems rather tame.

So, the question remains -- what are reasonable precautions to take? There is a strain of American thought which believes a man must own a gun if he is to defend his family properly. My upbringing is firmly anti-violence and anti-gun in general, and I tend to be in the anti-gun camp still. But I am somewhat swayed by the argument that one needs to own a gun in order to defend one's family. So what do you think? Should I get a gun? Why or why not?

32 hours ago I had no plans to purchase a big white van. Oh sure, I had been looking around, checking prices, getting a feel for the market. But I wasn't planning on making a decision until August or so. But it was a slow day at work and I decided to take a look at what was available in our area. 36 hours later, I am the proud owner of a 15-passenger Chevy Express. And a car payment that is $1.98 more per month than I had hoped it would be in my best case scenario.

Stats: 2005 Express 3500, <42,000 miles, V8 engine (and they even filled the tank at no extra charge!), power everything, sliding door, AM/FM/CD, separate heating controls for rear passengers, dual airbags, tinted windows, traction control, etc.

They gave us enough for our minivan that we didn't have to put down as much cash as I had feared. So we may have a DVD player installed, and depending on what is left of what I transferred from savings we may spring for a GPS system as well. Or we may put that off until we go on a trip. We'll see.

The most important part: it fits in our garage. Barely. I used to think we had a decent sized garage. Now it seems really small. But we can fit both vehicles inside. Of course, nothing *else* fits in now. The shed is going to get a bit more crowded, I think. Anyway, here's a picture of our new transport in its new home:

Under normal conditions there are many voices speaking simultaneously in our house. This leads to a lot of, er, communication issues (read: children don't always listen). We are trying to train our children to stop what they are doing and listen to Jamie and me whenever we call their names. Part of this is to stop and listen any time they hear our voices.

Lately our 4yo has been taking this training to heart. Several times over the past week he has popped in to whatever room Jamie and I are in and asked, "Did you call me?" It's really a good thing, but it can be annoying as well.

Sunday evening, after he popped his head into the kitchen for the 3rd (at least) time and interrupted us while we were preparing dinner to ask if we had called him, I said, "The next time you think you hear us calling you, say 'Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.'"

So yesterday, he came out to Jamie and asked, "Did you call my name?"

"No. What are you supposed to say when you hear someone calling your name and it's not Mom or Dad?"

"Uh, I don't know."

"Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening."

So he immediately drops to his knees, bows his head, and prays.

"Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening." Then he jumped to his feet, looks straight into Jamie's face, and asks, "What did He say?"

Jamie, trying to keep a straight face, explained to him the need to be quiet and listen after he prays. So today, the scenario happened again. This time, after he prostrated himself and popped back up he said, "He said He loves me!"

Priceless.

This past weekend we were in Goshen for the annual fondue party. No one was able to make a weekend in December work this past holiday season (when all of us kids were still living at home, we usually had it on New Year's Eve, but that has changed in recent years), so we held it on Saturday night. My parents and two other couples have been having this party every year since 1974, and I've only missed 2 of them since I was born in 1977 (once when I was in Germany, and in 2006 right after our 1yo was born in early December).

We had 21 people there this year, down from 30+ a few years ago. But it was still a lot of fun, and the food was excellent as usual. Afterwards we played games, including Trivial Pursuit (tradition!) and a new-to-me game called Apples to Apples. We also played 25 Words or Less, and then the hardest-core gamers among us (including me, of course) played a game called Ticket to Ride. Good stuff.

Saturday in Goshen was awesome. There was about 3" of snow on the ground and Dad and I took the four oldest kids sledding at a local park. Sunday it rained. Meh. On Monday it snowed again while we were driving home. In between we had a nice time visiting with my parents. I always miss Goshen most when I'm leaving it. Such a nice town. *Sigh*. I also always feel a twinge of remorse every time I cross the Indiana-Illinois line heading west. I miss Indiana. But, those are the breaks. I am already looking forward to the real 2008 edition of the fondue party!

We had a scare at church today. I was just getting ready to walk out the door with all five children (actually, we were already standing outside) when a car came careening through the parking lot we were about to cross and swerved into the lawn about 30 feet from us. I had no idea what was going on but I grabbed all the kids (except for the 2yo who was still inside behind me) and pulled them back toward the door. I turned back around in time to see the car circle back around, run over a large tree stump, veer back into the parking lot, and then keep turning back into the lawn whereupon it struck a large pine tree head-on and stopped (obviously). In its first circle the car struck a utility pole and as a result there was a phone line on the ground and a power line hanging dangerously low.

The driver was the wonderful elderly woman who always sits in the row behind us. We don't know what happened but my guess is she must have had a mini-stroke and lost control of her vehicle as she was pulling out. The miracle is that there was no one in the parking lot when it all happened (the car was moving at about 40 mph in my estimation) and there was only one other vehicle damaged, but not badly enough to render it unable to function. I followed the tire tracks and rubber marks around and she had missed several other vehicles literally by less than 6 inches.

The dear woman was quite shaken up and of course we called the ambulance and she was taken to the hospital. Her airbags had gone off and that seemed to be what bothered her the most. A woman who was visiting the church today just happened to be a nurse and knew exactly how to care for her before the paramedics arrived (hmm, quite the coincidence, wouldn't you say?).

Once the shock was over, it took me a little while to realize how close we came to being injured. If any one of the children had run out into the parking lot ahead of me instead of obediently waiting for me. . .if it had happened 10 seconds later when we were all in the middle of the parking lot. . .well, I wouldn't be writing this right now. I don't have anything profound to say in conclusion. I am profoundly grateful for the mercy of God this day and also for your prayers to join with ours for our sister Pearl as the doctors care for her.

Jamie and I have been watching "The Ten Commandments" recently (it has taken us 2 nights so far -- it is a long movie!) thanks to Blockbuster Total Access. It's the kind of movie that (A) Hollywood doesn't make anymore and (B) one wouldn't find in a rental store.

At any rate, last night we made it to the Passover scene before my tired, pregnant wife had to call it quits for the night. I stayed up a few minutes later reviewing our finances, as I am wont to do.

Shortly after Jamie got into bed, I heard the door to the boys' room open. No big deal, because one or another of them often comes out to use the restroom after being tucked in. The hardest part is training them *not* to inform us every time -- they know where the bathroom is, they know what to do, so it doesn't require our permission or our involvement. Or so my thinking went.

At any rate, I didn't even look up until I heard footsteps out on the Pergo floor of our great room -- nowhere near the bathroom. Like a moth, the 4yo was drawn to the light of a lamp that had not been turned off yet. The trouble was, he really did need to be in the bathroom. He was clearly not awake, either. I called his name several times, and the only response was "oh, oh" and a little pee-pee dance. I still wasn't sure what was going on, so I put down the laptop and ran over to him just in time to see him pulling his pajama pants down with the desk squarely in his sights.

I yelled "wait, let's go to the potty first!" and grabbed him by both arms with the intent of getting him there first, but once the fresh air hit him it was all over. And boy did he have to go. The puddle was at least 2 feet in diameter. Fortunately I got there in time to redirect him from the desk to the middle of the floor. But he kept dancing while he was doing his business, and managed to soak his pants along with the floor.

It was one of those times that I've come to learn to accept and enjoy. Even if he had gotten the carpet or the desk, it still would have been hilarious. I was gasping with laughter the whole time while trying not to make him feel bad in the process. As I remarked to Jamie when everything was cleaned up, if everyone had kids like ours no one would care about watching television. Nothing you can see there is as exciting or enjoyable or entertaining as living life in our family.