Naginata

More dKos Fun

Daily Kos makes another fun mistake:

At the Khuderbegainov trial I met an old man from Andizhan. Two of his children had been tortured in front of him until he signed a confession on the family's links with Bin Laden. Tears were streaming down his face. I have no doubt they had as much connection with Bin Laden as I do. This is the standard of the Uzbek intelligence services.

Of course, this runs under the headline "Torturing Children", and the post itself includes commentary on how low it is to torture children. I'm not even getting into the torture argument here, I just want to point out some things:

-The bit discusses Bin Laden, meaning that the event most likely happened since 2001, if it's connected to us. If it happened before then, I'm guessing it involved Afghanistan.
-It refers to the man as an "old man".

So, it's most likely that one of two things happened here. Either the old man was made to watch, since 2001, while his adult children were tortured, until he signed a confession, OR the old man was made to watch, many years ago, while his minor children were tortured. In which case, that torture was probably carried out when bin Laden was busy fighting the USSR, and at the direction of the Evil Empire itself.

Either way, I don't have enough information, based on what you see at dKos, to decide.

At dKos

Google Books for Victory

You will love this little secret. It has ALREADY saved me some time, getting code from Java Examples in a Nutshell (3rd edition) for my current project.

And before you say it, I have Java Examples in a Nutshell sitting on a bookshelf (or in a box next to a bookshelf) at home. Not that I plan to confine my activities to books I own... but insert my standard disclaimer about how if you find yourself hitting a book over and over, you'll probably find a print version handy anyway, so go buy it. Not that any of you need incentive to buy O'Reilly books.

Forcefully extracted from the mind of our favorite communist under extreme duress. Loud, strange music and sleep deprivation? Are we sure that Gitmo isn't just an offshore programming operation?

I Don't Understand

If you don't care about the transit strike in New York, this bit isn't for you.

There's been no bus or subway service in New York for a few days now. People are walking a long way to work, or driving, and it's costing the city a whole load of time and money.

My question is this: why not just fire everyone striking? Seriously. "Ok, you didn't show up for work 2 days in a row, and you weren't slotted for vacation, so you're out." What would be wrong with that?

Musix

This site delivers what I want, with a minimum of fuss. It is "the win".

It also taught me that my tastes in music are apparently way, way out there, since my first several searches for songs/artists failed. Come on. Karma Slave is mainstream! Everyone loves NY Ska/Jazz Ensemble. The Pietasters? They're bigger than the Beatles.

Clippy

He's back, and he's singing the hits. Over there, on the side thing.

Fact Checking

So, the Kossacks are at it again. This time they're sort of thanking the AP for fact checking the president. I say sort of because the article suggests that they need to do it more often, and amid a little cursing notes that dKos is doing the media's job or something.

Riiight. Here's the AP article:

WASHINGTON Dec 19, 2005 -- President Bush is making selective use of an opinion poll when he tells people that Iraqis are increasingly upbeat.

The same poll that indicated a majority of Iraqis believe their lives are going well also found a majority expressing opposition to the presence of U.S. forces, and less than half saying Iraq is better off now than before the war.

Now then, dKos is blasting the president for being dishonest because he cited one part of the poll and not the other in his speech. Meanwhile, dKos has been citing one part and not the other of polls like this pretty much the entire war.

Just something I thought was amusing.

The Continuing Saga of the WoB

Today, I bring you pictures:

Thread Resurrection

Some time ago, my gracious webhost implemented captchas (which we all hate) to protect us from spam (which we all hate MORE). Since then, he's also removed the ban on comments on old posts.

I was hoping that it would lead to some old thread resurrection. And it has, with sexy results. I want to say this, again, and be clear: If you truly, truly wish to remark to me, without everyone reading it, drop your note to me in an email to _____ @gmail.com. You fill in the blank. No, really, guess. It's exactly what you think it is. If you just want to make an anonymous comment, make up a name on the spot. I suggest "FifthAmendment". I'd still like to know who you are, but I'll be much kinder to that, since you're saying "I don't want this comment to come back to haunt me" and not "I can't be bothered to identify myself".

Plus, I can always look up your IP anyway, so you may as well send me an email identifying yourself, to save me some effort.

Anyway, because I'm feeling chipper, here's some music to go with the comments Anonymous Beauty Face - nothot

For the next resurrection, I'd like to see some snarky comments on this post, which may be the best thing on this site. Calls for a sequel might even be answered. Possibly even with a sequel. Possibly with a darling pair of sentence fragments.

I'm blogging this

So, for the past couple weeks, I've been privy to an interesting story concerning one of my co-workers and his wife, who we've come to refer to as the "whore of babylon".

Seems a little harsh, doesn't it? Suffice it to say that no matter how much of the story I tell you, I'm leaving something out. That means that no matter how much of this story you read or hear, I've forgotten some tiny detail which would almost certainly make it worse than it is.

Anyway, the reason it's finally broken through that ceiling and become blogworthy is that today he handed me a stack of 6 pages and said "read this".

I'll come back to that in a minute. They've been married about 5 and a half years, and have two and a half, possibly three kids. That's the part that breaks my heart - the kids. This is almost certainly going to end badly for them. You can figure out on your own what I mean by "and a half". Think about it.

She's apparently quite the bitch. Oh yeah, language advisory, it might get worse before it gets better. I've spent a total of a half hour with her, and she seemed perfectly nice. She spent the time explaining a great idea that she and some friends have for a website. Apparently after they dropped me off at the airport, the rest of the drive home was full of her yelling at him, convinced that now I, a L33t H4x0r, was going to steal her idea. She's sure it's worth millions.

Just in case she ever ends up reading this site, hi there whore of babylon. Your idea isn't that great. I know you think it's the next flickr or del.icio.us or whatever, but either it's mediocre, or you're not smart enough to explain it properly. If it does make money, it will be the fault of the other people on your team... people you're probably sleeping with.

Anyway, this print out I read, let me say, I no longer have even a shred of a doubt where her infidelity is concerned. She is cheating on her husband, and I know names, times, and places. Needless to say, my first desire is to beat the stupid out of him, and then back in to him.

My question for you all is 2-fold.

1) What are my responsibilities as a friend here?

2) What should he (we) do about this?

First of all, my responsibilities as a friend. Clearly, at the minimum, I'm going to keep "being there" and all that jazz. I also make sure to talk him out of doing anything that might be illegal. I have relayed some of my experiences, as a child of divorce, that will hopefully help him as a father once the inevitable happens.

It's worth mentioning here that he's past being broken up about it. He's known about it for long enough that it doesn't phase him any more. He's still with her because he loves his kids, both of them, and doesn't want to see any harm befall them. It's not a "sensitive" issue for him, is what I'm saying. In his mind, he's been divorced for at least 6 months, probably a year or more.

2) What should he (we) do?

He has a pile of evidence, some of which I've now seen. To describe it as "spicy" would be accurate, and probably also a little too ambitious. It includes the following:

• A listing of which muscles are sore on whom
• Arrangements for future infidelity
• Discussion of future 'acts' - apparently they're in to... well, use your imagination
• A minor debate on the meaning of the word "assertive".
• Apparently the guy is taking Karate?

Now then, here are some of the ideas we have for this information. When I say he's past being broken up, I'm not kidding. He is honestly just looking to do something to make both of these people cry. In a malicious way.

• I figure out what karate school he goes to and enroll. Whoops, I forgot to pull my punches. Gosh darn, I'm just a beginner, I didn't know I could hit so hard.
• We post the entire email here, on this site, or on some other site, and then send a link to the WoB, her special friend, or both.
• We get lots of people (say, all of you) to drop the special friend an email with assorted special messages. Say, "don't hoe another man's garden" or possibly "she's married you moron" or maybe "Thou shalt not covet another man's wife. And seriously, she's not all that covetable." or even "Karma is a married man knocking on your door at 3 AM." Not that we want to threaten him.

It bears mentioning at this point that we're fairly sure he doesn't know that she's married. We're almost positive he thinks that she's divorced.

Anyway, that's the story. At the very least, I suppose I'll continue to be supportive, and post some of the stupid, stupid things she does here, for our entertainment. If, that is, there's popular interest.

Also signing special friend up for penis enlargement spam, that's probably a good idea too.

It's the happening thing

From Argen:

Open iTunes/iPod or Windows Media Player to answer the following.
Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrasing it is.

How many songs:
3240

Sort by song title first and last:
First- - II. Campera - Gerhard Meinl's Tuba Sextet
Last- Zoo York - Paul Oakenfold

Sort by time:
Shortest Song: Lucky - Joni Mitchell - 4 seconds ("Mostly it's just charles mingus mumbling")
Longest Song: Voices of Autumn Live 2004 (Earth) dj GT

Top Five Most Played Songs:
1. move your body - disc ripper
2. call on me - eric prydz
3. magale - belini and mendonca do rio
4. beds are burning - novaspace
5. inspiration - ian van dahl

(now, if I dont' count songs on the Bodywork V album, since they are all way more played than everything...

1. Flaming Clouds (Instrumental) - Alex MORPH
2. Dreadlock Holiday - 10cc
3. End Credits - David Newman (Serenity)
4. Steppin Out - Fantastic Plastic Machine
5. Unsent - Alanis Morisette

First song that comes up on Shuffle: Woodstock - Joni Mitchell

Search...
"sex", how many songs come up? 26
"death", how many songs come up? 8
"love", how many songs come up? 89
"you", how many songs come up? 260

Top 5 Recently Played
1. It's All Over - Youngblood Brass Band
2. Eyes Like Yours - Shakira
3. A Case of You - Joni Mitchell
4. Dandelions - Five Iron
5. Stolen Chocobos - Nobou Uematsu

That was fun.

Charles Colson wins again!

I'm really not trying to make this a "bash Chuck Colson" blog... but he called me out.

It's worth nothing that today's "Breakpoint" was delivered by Prison Fellowship President Mark Earley. Same thing, different voice.

Anyway, today's missive is all about the scourge of pornographic holiday toys. No, I'm serious. Stop laughing and read:

many of the most popular gadgets this year "come with ready access to hardcore pornography."

He goes on to list all the various holiday "toys" that include "ready access" to hardcore pornography. For example, the video iPod. Clearly the first thing that Junior is going to do with that iPod is go to SuicideGirls and download some naked iPorn. Now maybe it's just me, but if junior is hanging out and downloading video from pornographic websites, I'd think the last on the list of a parent's concerns would be what medium he was using to store and view it.

I mean, unless the parent is worried about eyestrain. It probably IS hard to make out which parts go where on that tiny little screen.

But that's not the worst of the porntoys - next in line is the high-tech camera and video phones, which are capable of wireless Internet access without filtering software. These phones can capture and store up to three megabytes of digital images.

Look, maybe you shouldn't buy your child a 300+ dollar cell phone? I know that's crazy talk, but perhaps you should let them deal with the comes-free-with-the-plan model? I mean, why not go after palm pilots and other PDAs? If you buy your kid a WindowsCE device with a card reader, they could be walking around with a gig of porn in their pocket.

Oh, that's right, because PDAs aren't seen as childrens toys, but cell phones are something that everyone over the age of 10 needs. Once again, parents, make appropriate choices.

the Sony PlayStation Portable is also Internet-ready and can be used to download pornographic pictures and video without any filtering from any wireless technology.

Appallingly, porn producers designed and released films for Playstation Portable within weeks of its launch. And keep in mind, PlayStation is intended for children.

There's so much here, let me break down his points one by one.

1. The Sony PlayStation Portable is also Internet-ready and can be used to download pornographic pictures and video without any filtering from any wireless technology. You know, actually, I'm going to go ahead and say that he has a point. Putting a "parental password" on PSPs to lock the internet functionality probably wouldn't be such a bad idea. Oh, except that would make them a lot less attractive as gaming machines. Now, I'm not a PSP owner here, so I'm not sure exactly what its capabilities out there on the wild internet are, but for content like that we discussed on the video iPod... isn't Sony the king of content protection?

2. porn producers designed and released films for Playstation Portable within weeks of its launch. Well of course they did. It's a new distribution and viewing medium. Producers of violent action movies released films for PSP within days of its launch. I don't see the point here - it's not like a 13 year old kid can go buy a porn UMD, and if he can, that's not the fault of the PSP directly.

3. PlayStation is intended for children. It's been a while since I cursed on here. Do you all mind if I curse? Bull shit. The PSP has some games that probably appeal to children, that's true, but at its core, the PSP is targeted at the market that grew up on the NES - a market full of 20-30 year olds. Yes, quite a few PSPs are going to end up in the hands of children, just like quite a few adults enjoy going to Disney/Pixar movies. But it's not as if Sony has introduced Rape me Elmo.
   

Wrapping up the PSP talk... look, the PSP is a powerful device. It's aimed at an older segment of the market than this guy thinks it is. It is wrong to think of a PSP in terms of a "gameboy", and more correct to think of it like a DVD player. Some content is not for children. If he's worried about this, might I suggest he get a Nintendo DS? Granted, I'd also argue that the DS is aimed toward an older segment (I have one!), but it will probably be "cleaner" in the long run.

Until Conker DS comes out.

Many parents have no idea that their kids have technological toys that can access porn—

Because if you're an electronics manufacturer, the first thing you do is to keep the capabilities of your devices secret. Seriously, parents, spend 5 minutes educating yourselves before you give your kid a 200+ dollar gadget!

What can you and I do about it? First, do not buy these porn-ready gadgets. If your child needs a cell phone, buy the non-video kind. Second, contact the companies that sell these things and demand they provide parental controls. Third, contact the FCC and insist that it develop guidelines for these new technologies.

• If you don't want a "porn-ready" device, don't buy one.
• Parental controls? They'll work about as well as they do on the internet, except the PSP/cell phone segment don't have nearly the memory or power. I think you might get a PSP with a binary "wireless/no wireless" switch... that your kid can probably hack his way around anyway.
• Alert the FCC! There's (still) porn on the internet!

In Europe and Asia, wireless companies are already making huge profits from mobile pornography.

If you're going to argue for porn to be made illegal, be a man and come out and DO IT already.

That is why we must fight the porn industry and its libertarian supporters harder than ever. How absurd when a nation decides that an adult's so-called "right" to view porn, anytime and anywhere, trumps a child's right to be protected from it.

And that's the line that convinced me to write this article. I think I qualify as a libertarian. I wouldn't consider myself a "supporter" of the porn industry. Don't get me wrong, I see his point, I just think it's silly. If this man, if this arch-conservative really wants to start painting libertarians as enemies of society, well, that's his choice. In that case, he'll get exactly as much support from me as the porn industry does.

And as to the child's "right" and the adult's "right"... look, I'm not going to make a sweeping generalization here, but let me speak for myself. There is porno on the internet. There is porno in digital formats. There are devices that can access the internet from anywhere. There are devices that can read digital media. In fact, Laptops can do both, and with a far greater look-over-the-shoulder chance. Are we going to ban laptops in public places?

Firefox Extensions

Sadly, the "I must not fear" extension is no longer available... but with the release of firefox 1.5 it's time to look through the ol extensions list. Below are the ones I have, most of which I can't live without:

DOM Inspector - Priceless for javascript development. If you want to see how bad the DOM can get, I suggest using this on any page generated by the struts-layout package. Yowza.

Talkback - I don't think this does anything... comes with the browser. Helps you complain when dta crashes things.

Nuke Anything - Giant flashing mortgage peacock or salacious singles ad causing problems at work? Right click and remove it from the page.

View Rendered Source Chart - Priceless. Shows you the page as it is, not the page as it was when downloaded, and provides color-coded and well-formatted blocks. If you are a developer, you cannot live without this extension.

All-in-one Gestures - This is a toy. That's not to say it isn't a fun toy :)

Live HTTP Headers - See the data your forms are submitting. Another must have for developers.

BugMeNot - If you read a lot of news behind compulsory registration, you need this extension. Never fill out another newspaper user info page just to read that one special article again.

Platypus - A helper extension for creating Greasemonkey scripts. If you know javascript, you don't need this. If you dabble in javascript and want to play around with greasemonkey, you might like it. Personally, I used it once and then went back to writing my own stuff.

Web Developer - Another must have. Comes with the browser.

Greasemonkey - Lets you execute any javascript on any page you want. Absolutely wonderful. For example, I wrote a script that removes all avatar and signature pictures from phpbb-based forums.

Tab Preview - If you sometimes end up with a dozen tabs open, this extension helps immensely. Shows you a thumbnail view of a tab when you mouseover the tab title.

foXpose - Tab Preview's cousin. This one gives you a button that lets you shrink ALL tabs to thumbnails and then pick the one you want.

Session Saver - Install it and then forget it's there. Saves your tabs from session to session. You won't even notice it until it's gone, then you'll curse. Loudly.

Tab Mix Plus - Probably the best of the "make tabs work better" extensions. The only thing it's lacking is the add a close button to every tab feature, but for that we have...

Tab X - Guess what this does!

Chronicles of Narnia

It's pretty good. Worth seeing, especially if you have children that are old enough not to be bothered by an opening scene featuring the bombing of london. This is a book that was read to me when I was very young, so I had a lot of anticipation. Finally, a movie that answers this age old question: can a centaur dual wielding magic longswords take a minotaur?

Because of spoiler potential, the rest is below the fold.

The good:
The White Witch was great. She was malicious and cold and everything she was supposed to be. Plus she totally took peter to school... almost.

The special effects were awesome.

The professor was perfect. He even looked like a faun.

I loved, LOVED the birds in the battle scene. It was amazing imagery, especially after the opening.

The bad:
I honestly didn't care about any of the characters that weren't Aslan, the Witch, the Professor, or the children. And really, susan's character wasn't all that great. For example, beaver just sort of died. One speaking part for him in the last 30 minutes would have been nice, even if it was just a one liner. Also the centaur general or captain or whatever, he needed more character. As it was, you get the feeling that he's a badass, and he'll serve peter, but why? People with that many badass points need a reason.

Could have done with more Peter training or planning or something. Make him more believable leading an army. As it was he just sort of bumbled around doing nothing.

Aslan's voice should have been a little more James Earl Jones and a little less Tommy Lee Jones.

The only main-ish character in awe of Aslan was the White Witch.

The Ugly?:
When Mr. Tumnus showed up, I kept waiting for him to take the sandtrout skin and overthrow his mad aunt. I couldn't NOT think about him as the God Emperor of Dune.

Chuck on Katrina and Compassion

Sayeth Charles Colson:

There is one group of Katrina victims for whom we should feel no sympathy whatsoever, and we should certainly not give them any help rebuilding. I'm talking about the owners of casinos, massage parlors, liquor stores, and racetracks.

I don't think I need to say anything else, but I'm going to anyway. Clearly people who drink or play poker deserve to lose everything. If it wasn't for them, I bet God would have stopped the hurricane. It follows naturally, then, that they should be forced to pay for the entire reconstruction.

1773

Penny Arcade's site has been sub-par lately. Here follows a letter wrote to tycho and gabe:

I decided to write a note revealing my feelings about the current state of your website, and realized that a far better note had already been written, in 1773 by the ever-prescient Ben Franklin. Here follows the words of Mr. Franklin, with some light *cough* changes by yours truly. I was merely going to post it on my website, but "my peeps" felt it was of such quality as to warrant your attention. Enjoy.

An ancient webmaster boasted that, tho' he could not program, he knew how to make a great website of a little one. The science that I, a modern developer, am about to communicate, is the very reverse.

I address myself to all webmasters who have the management of extensive domains, which from their very greatness are become troublesome to govern, because the multiplicity of their affairs leaves no time for testing.

In the first place, gentlemen, you are to consider that a great website, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. Turn your attention, therefore, first to your scheduled updates; that, as you bumble them, the next may fail in order.

That the possibility of this failure may always exist, take special care the updates are never incorporated with the host site; that they do not enjoy the same coherent links, the same privileges in punctuality; and that they are governed by poorer search functions, all of your enacting, without allowing them any share in the sensibility of the main site. By carefully making and preserving such distinctions, you will (to keep to my simile of the cake) act like a wise gingerbread-baker, who, to facilitate a division, cuts his dough in half through in those places where, when baked, he would have broken it to pieces.

Those slavering masses have perhaps been drawn, cajoled, or coerced, at the sole expense of the fans, of their cohorts, without the aid of the webmaster. If this should happen to increase her popularity, by their timely visits, readiness to join in her statistics; her commerce, by their growing demand for her manufactures; or her advertising power, by greater employment for her writers and artists, they may probably suppose some merit in this, and that it entitles them to some favour; you are therefore to forget it all, or resent it, as if they had done you injury. If they happen to be zealous fans, friends of humor, nurtured in regular updates, remember all that to their prejudice, and resolve to punish it; for such principles, after a revolution is thoroughly established, are of no more use; they are even odious and abominable.

However peaceably your fans have purchased your wares, shewn their affection to your creations, and patiently borne late updates and site failures; you are to suppose them always inclined to read PvP and treat them accordingly. Quarter broken links among those updates which by their comedy may provoke mirth and merriment, and by their random Microsoft homepages and quasi-functional redirect scripts suppress them. By this means, like the husband who uses his wife ill from suspicion, you may in time convert your piss-poor update schedule into the norm.

Your fan, no matter how badly run your website may become,
Anonymous 'Naginata' Johndoe
http://www.notblog.com/naginata

Good ol' Chuck

I get Chuck Colson's "Breakpoint" radio transcript via email every day. It's one of those things that I read when I get in, or sometimes during lunch. It's sometimes obvious, sometimes pertinent, sometimes just plain silly... and occasionally, you get a real gem like today.

He starts out strong:

Nearly every story about the H5N1 strain of the flu virus invokes the flu pandemic of 1918-19. That outbreak killed an estimated 675,000 Americans and as many as 100 million people worldwide.

Good, that sets us up. Then we get on to "the point":
Where did that number come from? Someone simply multiplied 675,000 times three, the increase in population since 1919.

And the evidence in support of his "this is hype" position, which anyone but the sort of person who listens to Breakpoint without questioning it every day would think of on their own:
In his Weekly Standard piece, science writer Michael Fumento points out that the 1918 flu usually did not kill its victim directly; they died from secondary infections. This matters because we have something that they did not have in 1918: We have antibiotics.

Then he spends some time ripping in to "the media" and "sensationalism", which, I'd repeat here, but chances are you could come up with your own and it would be pretty close, especially if you've ever heard Chuck before.

Of course there's a jab at scientists... which I'm not altogether against:
Once a theory becomes scientific orthodoxy, those who question it are regarded as?what else??heretics. Just ask anyone who has doubts about global warming or whether an asteroid caused the dinosaur's extinction.

And then he goes off the tracks:
Twenty years ago, [Michael Fumento's] book, The Myth of Heterosexual Aids, challenged another reigning orthodoxy: that is, that HIV/AIDS would "break out" into the general heterosexual population.

Not the position I would have taken. You had me at "antibiotics".

I mean, isn't today world aids awareness day or somesuch? Aren't there countries in Africa where 40% of the population is HIV-Positive? Do we think that 40% of the population there is gay?

*crazy crazy liberal mode on*
I think what Chuck means is that HIV/AIDS is a problem only if you're gay OR black. And since God hates those groups of people anyway, heck, is it all that bad that they have AIDS?
*crazy crazy liberal mode off*

I mean, if someone wants to present some evidence in the face of a popular scientific theory (say, global warming), or make an argument against the hyped position (the flu thing), that's great. I just don't know where he's going with this AIDS statement. I mean... Eventually, Fumento was vindicated, although his critics still do not admit it.

Yep. Fortunately AIDS killed all the queers and then died out. Now we the God-fearing woman-loving men of the world can move on with our lives.